Friday, January 6, 2012

As I sit to write about my Winds of Change experience, I gaze out from my living room windows, seeing a dark sky and a layer of newly fallen snow blanketing trees, rooftops, and earth, our first real snow of the season.

In preparation for Winds of Change, I re-played one of my favorite Om chant videos as background music, having just finished watching the beautiful array of colorful mandalas fading one into the other. As I listened, I built a fire in the small wood stove cornered along the north wall of the living room. With every action - crumbling old newspapers, opening the windowed doors to the wood stove, placing the crumbled papers on the grate, gathering sticks stacked beside the stove, strategically placing them over the papers, selecting two sticks of wood, one a birch log, my favorite wood scent, positioning them on top of the pile, striking the match, lighting different pieces of paper, putting the protective screen in place - I was conscious of sounds, smells, textures, positionings and motions. I also opened myself up to the "presents" of each of you, wherever you were, whatever you were doing, inviting you into my experience.

As I entered the kitchen to freshen my cup of Egyptian licorice tea, I heard my phone ringing in the living room. Though I missed the call, when I checked my phone, I noticed that it was from my mother, so I decided to call her back. Talking with my 86-year-old mother is always inspiring - in~spire - in~breath - to take in a fresh breath - and the entire hour and a half was dedicated to our sharing. I wish I could have recorded our talk, it was that powerful, uplifting and holy. Our topic - our own day-to-day, moment-to-moment evolution in consciousness - was truly aligned with my original idea for Winds of Change as a conversation about the great shift that is taking place on a global and universal level. I am eager to hear how your own WoC was, as you all were WoCing along, side by side with my mother and me. Please feel free to post your experience here. Namaste.

2 comments:

  1. This WoC event took place as my 92 yo father experiences increasing physical and psychological challenges that move him closer to nursing home care. A flurry of emails with siblings and doctor have peppered an already full week.

    My sleep was disrupted last night and when I finally went back to slumberland, I slept until after 8, the start of WoC in my time zone. A quick check of email found one that triggered anew my anger at one of my siblings who continues to remain uninvolved in this process, leaving the tasks for the rest of us to do.

    So I arrived at my cushion fuming. I remembered Thich Nhat Hanh’s advice to hold our upset as a mother tenderly holds her crying child. For the next half hour, this was my work. I would feel anger rising, hot and sharp, and suddenly I was writing angry emails in my head. When I recognized what was happening, I’d move back into holding mode, finding an instant shift toward calmness, to knowing myself larger than the anger, to compassion for the now much~smaller anger. Until, that is, the next moment when I was swept up again. This happened repeatedly, though by the time the bell sounded at the end of my half hour sit, I had reached a deeper level of acceptance.

    I recognized this as time well spent, practicing holding a higher vision. And it was the thought of you all out there that helped me return to it again and again. Thank you!

    But the story does not end there. I finished the morning in bookwork and making client phone calls, and then moved to my local office to see folks in person. Throughout the day, though, the email flurry continued~~ideas bouncing mostly between the three involved siblings, though Dad’s doctor was part of the loop at first, on how to best support my father in his bouts of panic. Gradually our various ideas gelled into a plan.

    And as that plan was finalized, I saw what a gift it was to be part of this group, this family, saw how together we created something richer and more full than any of us could have done alone. I saw more clearly all I get back from the commitment of time and energy and heart. This is the stance I choose and somehow, in that recognition, I was able to allow my disengaged brother to choose his. No need for anger on my part. I reap what I sow and so(w) does he.

    So I end this day with a heart grown just a bit softer. Thank you all for being a part of my unfolding.

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  2. Loanne,
    It is easy to share our light, not always so easy to share our shadow.

    I am touched by your vulnerability (vulner, from the Latin root word for wound), your ability to be a wound, opening yourself up to all of us by sharing your process, step-by-step, through your anger.

    I am grateful that you harnessed the Winds of Change by bringing us with you through the ebb and flow of your voyage, darkness and light, darkness and light, darkness and light, to Light.

    Your experience is confirmation not only of your commitment to evolving consciously - bravo - and truly utilizing the Winds of Change, but also of the power of hearts joined together.

    You were the actualization of synergy, showing that a cohesive group is indeed greater than the sum of its individuals.

    I am honored by your sharing and honor you for sharing. Namaste.

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